


You've Made Your Bed (So Sleep In It)

by DashFlintceschi



Series: Prompt Table [21]
Category: You Me At Six
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, M/M, References to Past Domestic Abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-19
Updated: 2020-04-19
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:07:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,501
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23732827
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DashFlintceschi/pseuds/DashFlintceschi
Summary: April 19th was the day Dan's life began to fall apart, now it's the day he'll start putting the pieces back together again.
Relationships: Past Josh Franceschi/Dan Flint
Series: Prompt Table [21]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/510521
Kudos: 1





	You've Made Your Bed (So Sleep In It)

**Author's Note:**

> Number 36 - Substance Abuse.
> 
> I chose this date as a random future date when I started this one back in 2016, so of course when I realised it was coming up, I had to come back and finish it in time to post it today.

It’s the 19th of April 2020, exactly three years to the day since Dan’s life went tits up. Well, kind of. It’s three years to the day since he and Josh split up. After that followed the three most excruciatingly awkward weeks of his life, until he realised that it just wasn’t going to work anymore, and he left the band. They’d replaced him within a month, with some douchebag with bad hair and a worse attitude, but he can stay in the same room as Josh for more than five minutes at a time, so it seems to Dan that that’s enough for everyone.

In the three years since, Dan has rarely, if ever, been sober, but today is worse than usual. Usually, he’s just drunk enough to dull the pain, but still able to function. Today, though, on the anniversary of the worst day of his life, he’s trashed. He’s been drinking since he woke up just after seven in the morning, and by half three in the afternoon, he can barely walk, or see, or even think. That’s what he wanted, though, to not have to think, and he’s achieved it very well.

He’s trying to make his way home, having been cut off or refused service from every pub and off-licence he’s encountered. He has a large, mostly full bottle of some god-awful, unbelievably strong vodka someone gave him for his birthday one year, and he intends on finding it and finishing it within the next hour or so. 

Three streets away from his flat, though, he loses his balance, and ends up sat on the ground, back pressed against the wall of a building, finding he has neither the energy nor the hand-eye coordination needed to get back up.

He’s been there for a while when he hears laughter and approaching footsteps. He doesn’t care, they’re not the first ones to laugh at him on their way past and they probably won’t be the last. As they get closer, though, the laughter trails off and the footsteps slow. Only one of them seems to still be laughing.

“Fuckin’ hell, check the state of this tit!” A northern voice laughs, and a far too familiar voice that makes Dan’s gut clench painfully replies.

“Shut the fuck up, Sam. You alright there, mate?” The voice of Josh Franceschi calls out, and Dan lets his head fall back against the wall behind him, giving them their first good look at his face.

“Been better, Jay, you?” Dan slurs as they gape at him, seemingly shocked into speechlessness and frozen to the spot, until Max regains his composure and closes the gap between them, leaning down to hook his arms under Dan’s armpits and hauling him to his feet. He tries to let Dan go once he’s upright, but has to grab him again as he sways dangerously. It takes a few tries, but he finally gets Dan stood upright on his own, until Josh speaks, and Dan’s head whips around, making him lose his balance again.

“What the fuck happened to you?” Josh asks softly, his voice and eyes horrified, and Dan laughs humourlessly.

“You did. Or did you forget? It’s been three years exactly since you fucking destroyed me. It’s your fault I’m like this, so save your fucking pity,” he snarls, batting Max’s hands away from himself and turning, hand pressed against the wall beside him for balance as he starts to stagger away, but Josh’s harsh voice stops him.

“You have some fucking nerve, saying I was the one who destroyed you, when you… You don’t remember, do you? You don’t remember what you fucking did,” he trails off incredulously, and Dan turns back to squint at him.

“I have no fucking clue what you’re talking about,” he snaps, and Josh laughs harshly.

“You fucking hit me!” He barks, and Dan’s eyes widen in shock.

“You what? How the fuck could you say that? I fucking loved you!” He snarls, and Josh scoffs.

“You did, until you turned into a fucking alcoholic, and when I tried to make you stop, you punched me in the fucking face,” he snarls back, and Dan shakes his head sadly.

“And I thought I was pathetic, at least I don’t need to make up shit to make myself feel better,” he laments, and turns to leave, ignoring Josh’s angry voice this time.

He gets to the end of the street before he notices Matt walking beside him, a gentle hand on Dan’s elbow to keep him steady. He tries to shake him off and make him leave several times, but Matt doesn’t budge. He eventually gives up and allows Matt to follow him home, keeping at least one hand on Dan’s person to support him at all times.

When Dan finally staggers into his flat, he starts to head to the small kitchen, but Matt stops him.

“Hey, why don’t you sit down, and I’ll make us some tea?” He suggests, and Dan eyes him suspiciously.

“Why are you here?” He asks warily, making Matt smile sadly.

“You may have cut off all contact with us and disappeared off the face of the earth, but you’re still our friend, and you need help,” he insists, and though Dan isn’t convinced, he still nods and heads for the couch.

When Matt comes back to the living room with two steaming mugs, he’s glad to see his plan has worked. Dan’s always been a sleepy drunk, and Matt had been hoping that hadn’t changed. It clearly hasn’t as he finds Dan slumped to the side, snoring softly. He sets the mugs down on the coffee table, settles Dan on his stomach with a blanket over him, then gets to work. He works diligently, both tidying the flat and emptying any bottles of alcohol he finds down the sink as he goes.

Dan sleeps right through to the next morning. By the time he wakes up, Matt’s tidied the entire flat, and there’s not a single drop of alcohol left. Matt’s already awake, sitting in the armchair next to Dan’s head, eating breakfast he’d gone out and picked up. Dan groans pitifully as he slowly sits up, reaching gratefully for his own plate and mug of coffee Matt left on the table for him. They eat in silence for a while, until Dan takes a sip of his coffee and grimaces.

“Thought that was how you took it?” Matt mumbles around a mouthful of bacon, and Dan nods slightly.

“It’s not that. I just remembered the godawful dream I had. I guess what Josh said planted the image. We were on a tour bus, and he tried to make me stop drinking, and I started hitting him, and I just kept hitting him and hitting him, over and over. It was horrible, but I _know_ it didn’t happen,” he recounts, and Matt tenses as he answers.

“You’re right, it didn’t. You only hit him the once,” Dan freezes as he realises what Matt said, slowly turning his head to stare at him with wide, horrified eyes.

“I-I don’t know what he’s been telling you, but-”

“He didn’t have to tell us anything, we were there, all three of us. He’s not lying, you hit him, and we all saw it,” Matt insists, watching sadly as realisation hits and Dan crumples, his plate sliding to the floor with a clatter as he sobs helplessly.

Matt comforts him for a while, and when he finally starts to calm down, Matt pulls out his phone and dials Josh’s number. When Josh answers, Matt doesn’t say anything, just hands Dan the phone.

“I’m so s-sorry. I’m so, so sorry,” he hiccups, and Josh sighs tiredly.

“Well, I can’t say I forgive you, but I accept your apology. Can you give the phone to Matt, please?” He asks gently, and Dan sobs softly, but gives Matt the phone as asked. “Is he drunk?” Josh asks before Matt can say anything.

“No, I got rid of it all while he was asleep. He might still be a little drunk from yesterday, though,” he tells him, and Josh sighs.

“Has he actually agreed to stop drinking, or has he just not realised that you got rid of it yet?” He asks, and Matt turns to look at Dan. That thought hadn’t occurred to him. If Dan didn’t know before, he definitely knows now. Dan’s just sitting with his head in his hands, crying softly.

“Dan? You gonna stop drinking, mate?” He asks hesitantly, and Dan nods sadly. “Yeah, he’s gonna stop,” he tells Josh, and he hears Josh shifting.

“Okay, he still in the same flat?” He asks, and Matt answers in the affirmative. “Alright, I’ll be over in about ten minutes. The others will probably be with me,” he finishes, and although Matt doesn’t think Josh is stupid, he feels the need to say it anyway.

“Don’t… Don’t bring Sam,” he hesitates slightly, and Josh snorts.

“As if. I’m getting sick of his shit, anyway,” he assures him, and Matt nods to himself as they end the call.

By the time Dan’s managed to calm down, he’s surrounded by his once best friends. He can’t bring himself to look at Josh, and the other three aren’t much easier, the wariness and pity in their eyes hurts something deep in his chest. So he stares desolately down at the fresh coffee Matt handed him a few minutes ago, waiting for one of them to say something.

Finally, after several long, tense minutes, Max quietly clears his throat.

“We need to know how long you’ve been relying on booze to get through the day,” he asks softly, and Dan startles slightly, opens his mouth to insist it’s only been the past three years, but closes it again without a word. He’d convinced himself of that, but he knows it’s a lie, and he knows that they know it too. He takes a long drink from his mug as he slowly thinks it over, wanting to be as honest as possible with them and with himself for the first time in a very long time.

“I think it’s been about seven years now, since I started relying on a couple of swigs of vodka as soon as I woke up,” he finally admits, voice so soft they almost don’t hear him. When what he’s said hits them, all they can do is gape at him. They’d had no idea. They thought they’d known what he was like when he was drunk, had partied with him enough over the years, had dealt with him staggering and belligerent enough nights in those last few months, to think they knew every level of drunk Dan with pinpoint accuracy. To find out now that for four years, he’d been some level of drunk all day every day, they almost don’t know how to deal with that.

They’re quiet for several minutes as Dan wallows in his misery, and the four of them reevaluate every interaction they had with him in that time, until Josh breaks it with a soft sob, his hand coming up to cover his mouth as a few more slip out. Dan closes his eyes and curls in on himself as Chris moves to pull Josh into a hug, mumbling softly to him and gently shushing for a few moments until Josh manages to calm enough to look at Dan and take a shuddering breath.

“So… You’re telling me all those times we slept together, you were drunk? You were drunk, and I took advantage of you?” He asks shakily, and Dan’s head shoots up, looking at Josh for the first time since they got there as he quickly shakes his head.

“No. No, no, you didn’t, I swear. I pushed you away so many times, when I was too drunk, when I couldn’t think straight enough to know what I wanted. You remember that, I know you do. Those would’ve been the times I’d have been taken advantage of, and you didn’t, Jay. You respected it, you backed off and took care of me. All those other times, all the times I said yes, I wasn’t drunk, I was tipsy at most, and I knew what I wanted, my head was clear enough to make that decision, I promise.” He’s practically begging, pleading with Josh to believe him, desperate for him to know that he never unknowingly did something like that.

He’s tense; and desperate for a drink; for several moments as he and Josh stare at each other, Josh’s mind clearly turning it all over. Finally, he nods slowly as he accepts it, and Dan sags with relief, eyes dropping to his hands again as he remembers why he couldn’t look at Josh in the first place.

“I just wanna say, and I know it’s not likely any of you will accept it, but I truly am sorry for everything I put all of you through. Everything I said, everything I did, having to deal with the fans and a new drummer when you couldn’t handle me anymore, I’m so sorry for all of it.” He tells them softly, but so very sincerely, his grip tightening on his mug as tears he didn’t know he had left slip down his face. He jumps a little when he feels Chris’ hand on his back, and doesn’t let himself hope enough to relax yet.

“We accept your apology, mate. I think it’ll be a long time before we can forgive you, and nothing will ever be the way it was before, but we can definitely accept your apology.” Chris tells him quietly, and Dan nods, it’s more than he’d been expecting. “But that’s only as long as you don’t go right back to the drink, mate, you’ve got to work at this and get better, that’s the only way we’ll stick around, yeah?” He continues, and Dan nods quickly, forcing himself to lift his head and look each of them in the eye one by one, no matter how much it hurts him to do.

“I will, I swear, I’m done, no drinking again, ever. I need to do this, for you guys and for myself.” He agrees determinedly, and the four of them finally let themselves relax the tiniest bit, it won’t be easy, and they know how likely it is that he’ll relapse at least a few times, no matter how committed he is, but as long as he keeps trying, they’ll be there to hold him up.

April 19th is a day of change for Dan. It was the day he began to lose everything; the day he started putting his life back together again; the day of his one and only relapse three years later; and the day he reminds himself every year how lucky he is to have friends who, while nowhere near as close as they once were, still have his back when he needs them most.


End file.
